Not everyone on Grindr is after sex. There are plenty that are on just to meet as friends and some that are even looking for a LTR (long term relationship). I myself, was after only two things. Friends or sex, or any combination. <edit: wait does that make it three things?>
I first started chatting to Jude while his dad was visiting from back home in the UK. We hit it off quite well on Grindr and both said that we would like to meet in person, as friends. I asked Jude if he would like to meet up one night during the week and he said he would like to, only his dad was here and it was hard to get away.
We chatted on and off for the better part of the month, often at Jude’s initiation. Jude started to ask me if I wanted to meet up on a fairly regular basis – even though his dad was still here. I would say yes and offer a suggestion of a wine bar. Jude would always say he couldn’t make it out at night or for too long, you know, cause his dad was here.
So one day I asked for coffee. ‘How bout we just meet for coffee?’
‘Sure.’ he replied, ‘…or we could just meet for sex.’
<blink blink> hang on a second here, this guy initially wanted to only meet as friends, we got on quite well when we chatted, but doing the dutiful son thing, we could never meet up. Or so it seemed. Hmmm…
This pattern of conversation continued on for the better part of the month, pretty much the length of time that his dad was staying in town. We would chat, make plans for coffee, then Jude would want to just meet for sex, and always pull out or cancel.
I was quickly getting tired of the way the conversation would go, after all, if all he wanted was a quick shag, why not just say that from the get go. What was with all the conversation? The niceness. The raised hopes and cancellations. As far as I was was concerned, it was Grindr, if you wanted sex, all you had to do was say so. Simple. Done.
Feeling a bit messed around by the yes no nature of the conversations with Jude, my interests wondered elsewhere, maybe things would change after his dad left. For now, I would busy myself with guys that actually did meet up, that actually said they wanted sex and followed through.
See you when your dad leaves Jude, for now… Peter is busy.
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